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How to Build a Child’s Confidence!

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Your child is small, but he is capable of a lot. He’s capable of so much, that I am sure you’ll be surprised when you let him do things for himself and discover how to build a child’s confidence. Holding kids back is common for parents, so let’s talk about how to avoid doing it.

A 2 yr old that can climb on the potty, use the potty, flush the potty, wipe the mess off the toilet (if necessary, which it often is?) put his clothes back on, wash his hands, and go about his other business is impressive. I’d say that little guy is capable of a whole lot. He likely makes his parents pretty proud. Read my complete guide to potty training here.

Since you likely know I am talking about my own baby, let me say, I have no special skills, secrets, tricks, or smarts that enable him to do that. The fact that he can do that doesn’t make me great, it makes him great.

He has the ability within himself to do that. My only role in his ability is requiring him to use it. I show him what to do, spend some intentional time training, and then set a standard. This has been key for building his confidence.

How To Build A Child’s Confidence.

I want my children to love who they are. So early on as a new mom, I read a lot about self-esteem in children and how to build a child’s confidence. 

The most glaringly-in-your-face truth I read over and over again was their need to feel proud of their own accomplishments.

The more your child can do on his own, the more he has to feel proud of himself for. Rather than confuse a child’s lack of desire with a lack of ability, give him a chance. Things would never get done if we all waited until we wanted to do them.

This is the same with your child. If you know she is capable of doing something, let her do it. Require her to do it. Children who operate in the fullness of their abilities, discover self-esteem and benefit themselves and their families in many ways.

The Benefits of Confident Children

#1. The Help.

#2. Babysitters love them.

#3. They will be ready and willing to work when the time comes.

#4. More peace in your home!

Just what can your kids do?

Ask yourself this question, “who is the youngest child in our home capable of doing this?” Consider your kids and their physical abilities and assign a chore to the smallest member that can accomplish it. This frees up older kids to do more difficult tasks.

You will be surprised at what the “little’s” in your family are capable of.

What Does Intentionally Training Your Child Look Like?

Good child training happens on purpose. Spend some time intentionally training him on tasks. It won’t help the family much if after they do something, you have to come back after them and do it again.

Make a checklist or ask some prompt questions. Approach all chores and tasks this way. A step-by-step guide or guided-questions will help them complete an assignment, all the way until it becomes a habit. (go here for books to help)

Final Thoughts on How to Build a Child’s Confidence

Don’t hold your child back. Teach him, require him, turn him loose and let him shine! Your whole family will reap the benefits, but no one as much as the child learning of his abilities and feeling totally confident because of them!


  • Misby says:

    wow brilliant information thank you!
    My kids go to school and we only have 2 hours together. there is so much to read, write numbers and chores to do. how do you balance it all

    • Shelley says:

      Hi Misby!

      Thanks for reaching out! With only 2 hours together, I don’t have a good answer for you. Two hours is very very limited. Between bathing and eating, there’s not much left for vital parent-child connection. My limited advice would be to make sure at least 15 minutes of that 2 hours is spent bonding. Read a book together, snuggle, have a heart-to-heart talk or something that will tether your children’s heart to your own.

  • […] That means, that you have to take the very best information, and formulate a decision. Ask yourself, What can I do to give my child the greatest chance for success through their life? One answer to that question is SLEEP! Read more about setting your kids up for success here and here. […]

  • Allison says:

    I try so hard to get my kids to do things around the house, but I’ve been approaching this wrong! They think they’re doing it for me, they’re doing it for them & the whole family. There’s going to be a good talk to be had about chores & new responsibilities. I can’t wait! Thank you for writing this post!

  • Jessie Arras says:

    So true! I feel like we’re connected….like we’re sisters or something! 😉

Hi there! I'm Mama Duck,

I'm a stay-at-home/work-at-home, homeschooling Mama of 4 beautiful kiddos, wife to my loving husband, Parenting Coach, Speaker, and Writer. I adore the sound of my children's giggles, that first sip of hot coffee, and a snuggly blanket fresh out of the dryer. Here on Faithful Parenting, my heart is to equip mamas with the skills, knowledge, and biblical wisdom to raise fantastic kids and build a tethered family!